Esther Phillips
DRAX HALL
DRAX HALL
Ik moet hebben geleerd (rond acht,
negen jaar) van de dageraad te houden,
onderweg, een pan in de hand, om de melk
te halen uit Drax Hall Yard
waar onze opa zijn koeien hield.
Koele morgens, heggen
doordrenkt met dauw; geel kroop
terug in de ‘vroeg-late’ bloemen;
paars piepte door de kanariekers-
bladeren gebundeld in het houwsteen
aan weerszijden van de weg
geur van pruimen, rijpe guaves barstten
uit de greppel, vervulden de lucht.
Zodra ik de bouwvallige molen passeerde
bij Waterman-Straw, werd ik vergezeld
door de wijde hemel; roze, grijs, lila,
zo zacht dat ik bijna niet durfde te ademen
hoewel ik amper wist waarom.
Maar er lag iets besloten in die kalmte;
iets waar merels en mussen
van wisten, maar over zwegen.
Het lag besloten in de volhardende zang
van krekels en sprinkhanen;
het gefluister van khus-khus
als de wind erdoorheen gleed;
wolken, geruisloos, veranderden van vorm –
naar believen, of door mijn toedoen.
Dit was het begin van de poëzie:
deze zoektocht naar de prisma
half verborgen in het donker;
oren afgestemd op het ritme,
het stijgen en dalen van het kreupelhout,
veelzeggender
dan het rumoer om ons heen.
Hoe had ik kunnen weten dat mijn Muze
mij helemaal vergezelde
tot aan Drax Hall Yard
op die vroege morgens,
waarop de dageraad zelf
mijn eerste gedicht was.
DRAX HALL
I must have learnt (aged eight
or nine) to love the dawn,
walking, skillet in hand, to fetch
the milk from Drax Hall* Yard
where our grandfather kept his cows.
Chilly mornings, hedgerows
drenched in dew; yellow creeping
back into “early-late” flowers;
purple peering out from bird-vine
leaves clustered in the cut-rock
at both sides of the road
smell of plums, ripe guavas bursting
from the gully, filling up the air.
Once I’d passed the broken-down mill
at Waterman-Straw, the wide sky
walked with me; pink, grey, lilac,
so soft I hardly dared to breathe
though I scarcely knew why.
But something was in that quietness;
something blackbirds and sparrows
knew, but kept their silence.
It was in the insistent song
of crickets and grasshoppers;
the whisper of khus-khus
as the wind slipped through;
clouds, noiseless, shifting shape
at will, or by my creation.
This was the beginning of poetry:
this searching for the prism
half-hidden in the dark;
ear tuned to the pulse,
the rise and fall of the undergrowth,
more telling
than the noise around us.
How could I have known my Muse
walked with me all the way
to Drax Hall Yard
those early mornings,
when the dawn was, itself,
my first poem.
From: Witness in Stone
Publisher: Peepal Tree Press,
DRAX HALL
I must have learnt (aged eight
or nine) to love the dawn,
walking, skillet in hand, to fetch
the milk from Drax Hall* Yard
where our grandfather kept his cows.
Chilly mornings, hedgerows
drenched in dew; yellow creeping
back into “early-late” flowers;
purple peering out from bird-vine
leaves clustered in the cut-rock
at both sides of the road
smell of plums, ripe guavas bursting
from the gully, filling up the air.
Once I’d passed the broken-down mill
at Waterman-Straw, the wide sky
walked with me; pink, grey, lilac,
so soft I hardly dared to breathe
though I scarcely knew why.
But something was in that quietness;
something blackbirds and sparrows
knew, but kept their silence.
It was in the insistent song
of crickets and grasshoppers;
the whisper of khus-khus
as the wind slipped through;
clouds, noiseless, shifting shape
at will, or by my creation.
This was the beginning of poetry:
this searching for the prism
half-hidden in the dark;
ear tuned to the pulse,
the rise and fall of the undergrowth,
more telling
than the noise around us.
How could I have known my Muse
walked with me all the way
to Drax Hall Yard
those early mornings,
when the dawn was, itself,
my first poem.
DRAX HALL
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